What to do when you’re expecting… A wedding.

Dear married friends.

How on earth did you do it? I mean, going from engaged to married? This diamond ring has been on my finger for just over a month now and I’ve done the following:

  • Downloaded Pintrest.
  • Made a spreadsheet with various headings

That’s it.

Where on EARTH do you begin? I know I want a church wedding, and I know I want a party with my nearest and dearest, but I went to look at a couple of venues at the weekend and people were asking me about colour schemes and what kind of bows I’d want on a chair.

Then they said your napkins and table linen is included. Well yeah, I wouldn’t expect to go to a restaurant and pay extra for a knife, fork and napkin. Are you supposed to be like; “wow, thank you wedding venue, I’ll pay around £2k more than I would for a general party here and you’re throwing in the napkins too. Oh, but these bows, if I want them on my chair it’s £1 per chair.”

I mean come on, charging £1 per chair for a bow. Is this for real?

In my mind I feel like I need to decide on the below – although any kind of progress is, well, slow to say the least.

  • Sending out invitations
  • Guest list
  • Church
  • Dress and tux
  • Party venue
  • Bridesmates (not having girls)
  • Ushers
  • How much can we get away with spending on prosecco

After browsing one wedding magazine, I am starting to panic that I have no idea what I have ahead of me… I just want to marry my best friend, have a nice meal with my nearest and dearest then have a party where if people can make it, that’s just great.

I started to think of a guest list and could already feel the hate mail and conversations behind my back because people were only invited to the ‘night do’ – look man, I want my closest friends and immediate family at my wedding, just back off. And no, I won’t be bothered if I only come to your night do…

Is it REALLY necessary to spend as much money as you can on your wedding day? People are asking what flowers I’m having at the church, at the venue, who my make-up artist will be, who’s doing my hair, what wedding dress designers I like.

Please, someone, help me. And not a wedding planner. I don’t want to pay for you as well.

6 thoughts on “What to do when you’re expecting… A wedding.

Add yours

  1. I’m almost 2 YEARS engaged I started off well with the planning then got extremely overwhelmed and thought…sod it!! It’s a crazy game planning a wedding, I’m told it’s worth it though!!! Good Luck and …enjoy?!? Xo

  2. Aw hunni, it’s a total minefield. I was of the same opinion and wanted close family and friends. I didn’t want a great big lavish thing, that’s not what it was about for us. Start going to wedding fairs lovely, there will be loads starting in the spring and throughout summer. Everything you need will be at these, you’all hopefully get some inspiration on things like colour schemes and other things you would never have thought of. I liked them because everything was there in front of you, Pinterest is great but I liked to touch and taste and see things for myself.

    Good luck with it all, let your friends help, they’ll love it and it takes a little of the stress away from you. Try and enjoy it as much as you can as, such exciting times ahead for you!!

    I hope you don’t think I’m telling you what to do! I just found that I felt the same regarding not knowing where to start and I found the fairs very useful 👍🏻.

    All the best missus 🙂

    Aimee xx

    1. Thank you wonderful! I want Caz to come and do my hair and make up! Wedding fairs are a good shout! I hope you are well sweet pea. X

  3. The worst thing is… after it’s over you wi miss this planning stage. Try to enjoy every stage I found I was flying once I knew my colour scheme everything then fit into place. Pinterest have some great colour mood boards play around with some colours. It’s your wedding so do it the way you want, try not to care about what others think it’s a celebration of the both of you so have the things you both love. Not sure how helpful this is 🙈 All the best though and I promise once you get over this it everything will start to fly xxxx

  4. Hi Ruth,

    It’s been such a long time since I last saw you, back in the female first and posh frox dark days 😉 It’s so lovely to see you so happy and congratulations on your engagement!!
    Try not to feel overwhelmed just remember it’s your day so don’t worry yourself about what others say or do!
    It’s all about you and your husband to be, bin the rule book and create your own memory! make sure it represents who you are and what you both like. Don’t feel that you have to follow tradition of other weddings just do what feels right for you!!
    You will find that no matter what if the word wedding is in front of it the price goes up but shop around and you will find that it doesn’t have to cost the earth.
    For my wedding everything I always thought I wanted it turned out I didn’t so I was totally lost. We decided that we didn’t want to stay at home in dreary Wigan so went off to the lakes where we spent our first weekend together many moons ago. Anyway cut a long story short I looked at lots of lovely hotels and hated them until I found I small county house hotel that did exclusive use and was quaint and quirky and did amazing afternoon tea 🙂
    as soon as we found our little venue everything else fell into place, plus the sweetener for Adam was that they did a great deal which was all inclusive and a smidge of the list price if you opt for off peak (oct-mar) … so no surprise when he opted for a winter wedding! The staff were fab thoughout and dealt with all the nitty gritty stuff. for colours of frocks etc it just helped to choose style to suit my vintage venue. We even found a photography booth for the evening that’s set up in an old caravan that parks at the front and you pop in for your pics, just something a little quirky to add.

    Have a good look round where you fancy and I’m sure all will fall into place beautifully for you.

    Just remember you day is all about you and enjoy every moment!

    xxx

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